I knew that the only reason I was going in to the Big Brother house was because I was a shemale. I did not really mind that was the reason as it meant that I could still appear in my favourite TV show. I did not want to become a star, like many of the contestants did but it would be nice, just to see what it was like being watched all of the time. I had watched all of the series so far and imagined what it would be like to be in there. I had not been confident enough with myself to apply before and was thrilled that I was accepted the first time that I did audition.
The show itself was pretty nerve racking. I was so unsure as tow hat to wear and then when I got there I was worried that I might get booed by the crowd and then the worse thing was how to tell my fellow house mates. I did not want to keep it a secret but it is not something that you can just come out with and say. Once we all got there, we had a few drinks and people relaxed a bit. I decided to ask people why they thought they were picked to go in the house. This was the perfect opportunity for me to tell them that I thought I got picked because I was a shemale. This won me a lot of affection from the other housemates, I think because they appreciated my honesty and realised how brave it was to admit something like that, not only to a group of strangers but on national television.It was the next time that we had a few drinks, that I was approached by one of the more shy girls.
She had not spoken to me once before but we got to know each other well that evening. As time went by she said that she had a confession to make. She explained that she was a lesbian but she really missed certain things about men, specifically certain physical attributes. I understood immediately what she meant and why she was interested in me.
We changed the subject quickly, because it is not something you want to talk about at length when you are being watched by a TV camera.As the weeks passed, we were both lucky enough to stay in the house and we got to know each other better.
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