Bizarre Bras

If you haven't types "bizarre bras" into an Internet image browser lately, you probably haven't seen the ones I describe in this review, which is all the more the pity for you. (However, this is a deficit easily corrected; .)

Meanwhile, here are some of the highlights of my own searches.

One of the oddest of these items of intimate apparel is the goldfish bra. As its name suggests, it is an aquarium of sorts, consisting of two water-filled, clear plastic bags inside of which goldfish swim to and fro, perhaps imparting naughty tickling sensations to milady's breasts as they do so. (Titty Tip: By wearing this bra into a pet shop, a woman or a shemale can restock her aquarium free of charge, provided she isn't caught filching fish by a pesky security camera or guard.)

One design doubles as twin baby carriers, the infants resting atop the breasts inside comfy over-the-shoulder pouches similar to the cradle boards that Algonquin women once strapped to their backs so as to transport their papooses. (Titty Tip: This bra makes baby strollers obsolete and can double as a purse or cosmetics bag. However, one should not use it as a substitute for an infant's car seat.)

Another woman models a pair of flower pots in lieu of the traditional hemispherical cups, so that she can wear live houseplants, flowers, or even the vegetables of her choice for nutritious snacks wherever she goes. (Titty Tip: Careful she hasn't planted a Venus flytrap in her bra, boys!)

Two silver spiders, looking rather mechanical, adorn the breasts of another lady.

Possibly to piss of the PETA police, one designer has fashioned her brassiere entirely of raw bacon strips. Her bra may not meet everyone's tastes, but it definitely sizzles. (Titty Tip: Watch your dog or cat when this bra's being worn.)

A pair of hands, ankles extending from beneath milady's armpits, clutch her breasts in a truly handy dandy design.

One of the most bizarre bras sports a pair of dead pigs' heads in place of traditional bra cups. (Titty Tip: Whatever else might be said of the damsel who dares to wear this design, she's definitely ready for a luau!)